Saturday, August 7, 2010

Howdy

Been down with the flu these past few days. It hasn't been fun, and it's very surreal. You think all of your normal problems are gone, out the window, never to return and then, bam- life hits you with a little slice of normality, reality to really make you feel out of place.

It's tough, what we're all going through. Some of us can handle it on our own, some of us need a little more help than that. The important thing is, we're still going. Those of you out there running from him, fighting him, doing your best to live despite him; good for you. Don't let that bastard get ya.

It's not easy, but nothing in life really is or should be. You don't learn anything from 'easy.' Those of us running from him, we're in this together. Remember that, when you're feeling down and depressed about all this. It wont be a magic bullet, but goddamn if it isn't nice to have soem support. That's what I've learned in the past two weeks, is that support is there whether you realize it or not. You may feel like there is no hope, but remember that there are many others out there, just like you, just as scared.

And unless we're all screwed, which I am not inclined to believe, then there is still hope.

...I had a real good thing going with this girl.

For a long time, she was the light of my life. It wasn't a perfect fairy tale, but dammit I loved her, and it taught me a lot. I thought I was going to get married, go to college, raise a family and end up with a career. If you fight this bastard's control for any reason, any AT ALL, fight him because of what he took from you. Fight him because if he takes you life, he takes those memories. He takes everything.

And he can't be allowed to do that.

I think the reason he stands out so much, why he's so easy to spot, is because he's not supposed to be here. Every time you see him it's like a warning bell in your head going 'Huh. That's odd. It wasn't here the last time I checked.' That's what we've got against him, that's our advantage. We can't go fight him fists and guns a-blazing, so we have tofight him by living as and surviving as best we can despite the damage he's done. There's a lesson in that, somewhere.

It was my seventeenth birthday when I started seeing him. I'd heard about him online, and Marble Hornets had become a favorite time-waster of mine. I never thought I'd end up fucking posting about him myself, finding out we'd somehow brought him to life through our fear and our paranoia and our stories. I couldn't believe it when I first saw him, I thought it had to be my imagination. I had a paper route at the time, and I had to get up early every weekend to deliver. I'd look down the road and see this tall, swaying figure just standing there.

It couldn't really be him, so it just had to be my imagination. Until he was in my bedroom. Until he was staring right at me and the truth was in my face and there was only one option; deny the truth before me, or run and let everyone I know and love die.

Or let my girl die.

I couldn't do that, so I packed up and ran. It's been an entire year and I still can't comprehend the Slenderman fully. Every time I see him, I still get that 'It must be my imagination' feeling. It never goes away, and it never will for most of us. I think it's what we've been given as an advantage over him. And we'd best not squander it, because it's all we've got. Knowledge and understanding is our best weapon, and that's why I've set out to experiment and teach peopl ewhat works and what doesn't. We need to live because ultimately, life is our most secure foothold over him. Hecan never have it, if we don't let him.

I'm tired. In too many ways, I'm tired. I'm stil lcamped outin Denver, on a roof, sleeping shitty because of the flu. Haha, but I'll be okay. Hopefully I'll have som eneat pictures to put up here soon, and an interesting experiment in a week or two. Until then, peace out everyone.
Keep fighting. If not for yourself then for me, ya fuckers. :P

-Shaun

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