"Come and get me"

I refuse to succumb to that asshole, that monster's tricks. It wants my brain, It's going to have to tear it out of my skull. I am NOT going to become one of those freaks, walking around praising it in place of God. I don't bow to any monster.

I know, you're all probably wondering how the hell I'm still around. So am I, to be honest with you.

That was me posting that crazy message below, and sneidng crazy emails to Jay. Except...it wasn't me. It was It. Whatever that Thing is, It tried to take me over. I've been feeling nauseous and sick the weeks prior, and it's why I generally haven't updated as much as before, or done any experiments. It's been clawing at the inside of my mind, and all my concentration and effort went to preventing it from getting me. Somehow, It still did.

I was hitching a secret ride on the back of some guy's truck in the middle of nowhere when it happened. Actually, the guy didn't know I was in his truck, but I think he'd rather not seeing what happened next.

I sat tehre for a little while, and all of the sudden things got dead quiet. Looked aorund, saw nothing. I figured It must have been there somewhere, but...I couldn't see It anywhere close by, so I relaxed and tried to get some sleep. The instant I shut my eyes, I had a throbbing headache. It was like nails were being pounded into my brain.(This would have been an excellent time to monitor MY brain activity, eh, Jay?) When I opened my eyes up...there It was. Right on the back of the truck with me.

Things get fuzzy after that. I remember the truck tires screeching loudly. I remember the truck swerving. But what i don't remember is ever crashing or even passing out. It was just, one moment we're about to crach and It's looming over me with it's arms outstretched-- the next, I'm waking up in the middle of a forest and there's a laptop and a camera next to me. They're not mine, and I don't remember stealing them during my episode...but they're there.

There was a message on the laptop. It said 'Run.'

I refuse to call it a him any longer. it is not my master, and I feel like, by calling it by name or calling It something like that, I feed into its power-- over me, and over everyone else. I don't even like capitalizing 'It', but it's for clarity's sake. So oh well.

I'm going to start filming my travels with this camera of mine. I want you guys to know how I'm doing, and I want to demonstrate some things that might help keep people safe. You'll see. I've got soem ideas cooking. I plan to up the ante on my experiments. that fucker can't keep me down, and if It things I'm scared of it now, it's got another thing coming. Fucking bastard. Come into my mind and see what happens, why don't ya?

And I guess I can edit my videos with the laptop, haha. I wonder if that's what I intended when I stole them? Or if someone gave them to me for that express purpose...either way, I'm not sure what to do now. I'm still heading East, right now I've found a hotspot to type from.

One more thing before I go. I still want you guys to give me ideas for experiments, and for that, you've got to trust me. So if I don't end my messages with "Peace out", even through email to you or otherwise-- don't trust me. Because I'm not me, not if I'm not typing that. Hopefully, that'll be enough.

Don't let It win.

Peace out,
Shaun.

Pretentious (fuck off an die for this slenderfreak)

this is unacceptable. your insolence infuriates HIM. stop what you are doing. stop what you are doing. stop what you are doing. The Sage walks the path of the Damned. by HIS Damnation. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why.

(X)

Hah.

(X)

Hah.

(X)
Hahahaha.

pretentious. Give it back. It belongs to US. To take it is to take a part of the Final Plan. This is unacceptable.

You will pay.

Ugh...fuck.

I had a nightmare last night. I'm still feeling its affects. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary-- at first. But it changed, pretty quickly, near the end. I'll wrte about it more coherently when I have time.

I just feel like shit, needed to get that out.

Communication? I dunno, sounds like a bad idea to me.

I feel like I'm being pulled into a game I don't want to be a part of.

To Robert and Jay- You guys have to understand, I'm just a kid here. I want to save people, I really do. But I don't have the experience or expertise to understand half of what you guys are talking about. I'll gladly work with you on this, but I have certain conditions and specifics that we need to discuss. You've gotmy email, Jay, you know how to reach me. I'm still waiting for you to do so, Robert.

To everyone else- I don't think I'll be communicating with Him any time soon. unless I can think of a less dangerous, more practical way of doing so, I wont be attempting the dangerous feat of fucking talking to an interdimensional Thing from somewhere on the Underside of HELL. It was a crazy idea, posted on this blog for the sake of keeping myself sane while I sunk into depression. Sorry, M, for the heart attack.

I want to do a role call, like M has done on his blog. Please, if there is anyone out there, anyone at all in need of help, let me know on thsi blog. Is he following you? Do you believe one of your friends may be being followed? Or are you just interested in getting the fuck out of this mess before it eats you alive like is has so many others?

then let me know i nthe comments section. I can, and wish, to help. More importantly, I'm willing to do whatever it takes to provide you guys with answers. let me know what crazy ideas you guys have, and what information about Him you want. I'll come up with something and I'll try it out, and if I live I'll tell you how it went. If I don't, well...at least I(think) I'm dying with honor.

...

I miss my girl. I really do. I've been depressed as I head east, and I'm desperate for protection. I know I could easily lose myself if I wanted to, but that's not how I live my life. It wasn't before all this, and it wont be now, either. I plan on helping myself and helping others, no matter the cost. It would be easy enough to lack remorse, like jay, or just walk into his arms, like Beth...but I can't do that. That's not me.

Oh, and not to mention, I think he wants to hallow me out. He's tugging at my brain every time He comes around now, and i write symbols any time I get ahold of paper. Goddamn bastard wont take my mind, I swear it. I'll off myself before I let Him.

that's all i got, for now.  Hopefulyl you guys wil lrespond to this, so I can go on more suicide missions! :D YAY!

peace,
Shaun

EVP equipment?

I'm sorry, M, it's too tempting...

I'm going to see if it is possible to communicate or, at the very least, pick up audio from Him which might suggest some form of intelligent thought or feeling on his part. I've got it all planned out, and it wont be nearly as dangerous as the last one. I just need some equipment.

So that's why I'm posting this short update. I need to know from you guys what kind of EVP and audio equipment you would recommend. Nothing complicated, I just need basic supplies. If you can help out in anyway, that'd be great.

Oh and sorry I haven't updated in a long time. I've been travelling around and trying to keep as far ahead of him as possible. I actually met a nice family who took me in for a short while, but...I'll talk about that later.

Peace out,
Shaun